Last month, internet archeologist,
Dr. Maxwell Frey, stumbled upon the perfectly preserved ruins
of an online community called Friendster. Dr. Frey good morning to you.
– Good morning. Dr. Frey, tell us about this
amazing discovery of yours. Well, it was called Friendster, and at its
peak it was a vibrant social network with more than 50 million members. – 50 million! – Wow!
– That’s right. But then, out of the blue,
the civilization just ended and the site was completely abandoned.
– Strange. One day Friendster users were posting a
seemingly endless stream of bulletins about awesome parties and cool shows
and then nothing. That is so eerie.
– Total silence. Today the ruins of the site remain
perfectly preserved as they were at the time of Friendsters demise,
sometime around mid to late 2004 AD. Wow, their lives just come to a complete
stop like a fly trapped in amber. Exactly. It’s really beautiful.
You can see how much work went into it. Now you just made this amazing discovery just by looking through an
old desktops browser history? That’s right.
And as soon as I entered the site, I knew I was the first human being to lay
eyes on those pages in many, many years. There must be so much to learn
from the remnants of this site. There is. Evidence suggests Friendster
users or Friends were a simple people, spending most of their time
gathering the names of bands to display on large ornamental
favorite music lists. Oh, I’m getting chills just looking at it. Brand names were important to them
just as they are to us today, but they revered something called
Six Feet Under as well as The Shins. They also prize photos
of themselves drinking. Everyone looks so happy.
– Such a mystery. So what happened to Friendster? Well, no single explanation
is universally excepted, but some of my colleagues believe that a computer virus may have wiped out
a large portion of the Friendster users, and then the rest fled their accounts
out of fear. Others believe that Friendster was only
meant to exist temporarily to fill a void left by another mysterious
civilization known as ALL, or perhaps AOL. Now, if the public is interested,
they can go visit the ruins of the website at www.friendster.com . All we ask is that they don’t
alter any content. They leave the site just as they found it. Of course. Well, thank you Dr. Frey
for being our guest. Thank you Dr. Frey.
– Thank you. It was my pleasure. Coming up, a new study
has linked heart disease to eating like a big, fat, disgusting pig
that no one could love. Still ahead this hour:
How to punch up your boring will.
They should run a report on a the discovery of napster
who watching in 2017
Hopefully Twitter, an Facebook go extinct soon
We are currently on the throes of the last days of the maverick Facebook civilisation. Only the elders will soon be left since the young uns have all fled it's walls.!
Not having heard of Friendster before, I just unironically watched this video
But seriously the people of the future are gonna know a looooot about us through internet .
The last thing he said was really good foreshadowing for "Porkin' Across America"
this videos seems like less of a joke as the years go by
he won a nobel prize
Yahoo auctions….
They say in the deep marshes their lurks a lost city of lost splendour used to communicate between millions the legendary MySpace where, I believe it is only a myth still records shown in the decaying ruins of vine show some hints
Google+ and Facebook are next to go
Well this came true
But has anyone excavated the ruins of MySpace. I never got the chance to visit it but I heard it was a great mercantile civilization, comparable to Carthage.
I searched “internet archaeology” only because I found out about worlds.com
https://youtu.be/_WmojBYUHFY
Is friendster real, or was this a parody of MySpace?
This aged better than a Trump tweet.
Genius…just genius…
Like a pig, eh? Foreshadowing?
It’s funny to hear about “studies linking heart to disease to eating like big fat pigs that no one can love” from Pig Haeggerty
I'm from the future. I came back in time to research the disaster that wiped out the Facebook civilization.
"Aül"… I know this civilization.. I remember receiving numerous artifacts from this civilization – I believe they one thrived – distributing special coasters and chair stabilizers as cultural exchange.
I love the vest
No mention is made of the fable, lost city of MaiSpate…or, as it was pronounced by its people in their now-dead language, "MySpace"? Folklore has it that they bored themselves to death, and thus, by consensus, just faded away.
I have an AOL artifact from the last century, a silvery plastic disk in a metal cover. They were carried by trucks in masse and placed individually in little boxes in front of people's homes.
I heard new fossils from pets.com were uncovered recently. Sadly the multitude of species were wiped out from reduced traffic due to "dot com boom" impacting earth.
MySpace
I remember the AOL civilization trying to make me one of their own by sending me hundreds of CD’s (compact disk, think small silver frisbee) in the mail. Just to clarify by ‘mail’ I mean a living human being would put them in a box attached to my house. I feel like a dinosaur and I’m not even 40 yet….
Im doing archeology now
I just went to check out this lost civilization of Friendster and it not where they said it would be (www.friendster.com). It appears that it fell into the ocean or the ground opened up during an Earthquake and it fell in.
Geocities…
A good onion title is "scientists believe food to be the primary cause of obesity"
Google+ is another interesting ruin
20 0 4 AD, lol
2:22 – I kid you not, I had just put down the bowl, just finished the browner, after finishing a small pizza which I downed with coke
I couldnt even be angry – I just laughed
Also – am I being too "fan boy theory" when I link this comment [eating like a pig] to "Porkin around" and his ultimate demise
I love how he is dressed like Indiana Jones while he’s taking a picture with the computer.
This video is now itself more than twice as close to the age of Friendster than it is to us in 2019, a lost relic of the once thriving Onion Empire that ruled internet satire until the age of Trump killed political irony by creating a reality that was impossible for even the most outrageous parody to compete with.
I just ventured looking for the lost civilization of Friendster, but it's now gone. It must of gotten swallowed up by an earthquake or swept out to sea in a giant tsunami.
Friendster deleted all my data and i dont even know about it..
I completely forgot about Friendster Xanga i recall that one and of course there was AIM
Hey! Six Feet Under was fuck*ng great
Facebook one day. Hopefully soon.
The pig comment really hits you differently after watching porkin' across America
2:10, he made a mistake with his script
ok, i want to be an internet archaelogist
10 years ago, the Onion Report was comedy gold.
Now the Onion Report is something to take seriously.
I have visited the common ancestor of Youtube called Albino Black Sheep dot com.
It's so breathtaking.
I feel like an internet archeologist when I visit an old forum from early 2000’s.
This video is now older than friendster was when this video was made.
1:22 I had never heard of this website but I did that, the very long list of bands… I feel called out.
Friendster.com redirects to MOL which is some sort of investment site
whoa, whoa, whoa.. . Did he just say "awul" in this 2009 interview?! really??? really?! Aol was in business from the 80's to 2009, Mr "internet archeology"
"A new study links heart disease to eating like a big fat pig that no one could love!"
Um… foreshadowing!?
Internet archeologist is already a job
Internet historian
1:37 is that chase from House MD
Friendster had only been abandoned for 4 years between then and the upload of this video. Now it's been 14 years, it seems less and less farfetched as the years go by.
Sadly The Onion predicted it's own demise here… I mean it still once in a while makes content, but it's glory days are long gone.
I love the genuine reactions by the anchors…
Wow
2:20 foreshadowing for “Porkin across America?”
wait till they stumble across imagebords
Was this an actual website or did the Onion make it up?
Now watching this is being an internet archeologist
not a joke. in the future we can make money finding ancient websites and history
I honestly thought friendster or what ever never got off the ground and had almost no memebers.
I honestly thought friendster or what ever never got off the ground and had almost no memebers.
Hahahahaha 😂😂😂
: (
I miss myspace so much
cool artsy people everywhere
complete control of your page
According to Wikipedia, it was actual a real site.
Oh, that's why I have heart disease. Thank you!
The pronunciation of AOL was the best thing.
Its real search archieve website
Watching this in 2019 kinda makes me feel like an internet archaeologists lol
Hey!! That "archeologist" is mr. Andrews!! He taught me in geography in gr 9 lol so random
I just wanna say every single onions news predict the future including this
Soon, I will planning an excavation my self at the infamous "Obamacare.gov", I heard that everything is still untouched by humans on that site.
This is how an AI civilisation will study us.
Today’s equivalent is yahoo.
Graham Hancock has a new book coming out that explains this.
Someone should catalog the periods of the internet, from the AOLitic to the Faceboorassic
This video is now closer to Friendster in time than it is to us
I would like to do this job, one day.
But, I'd expect it to be called an "Internet Historian". 🙂
OH MY GOD HE HAS AN EMAC. EMAC GANG RISE UP. EMAC > IMAC
Back in the day I've found an artifact which emitted ominous beeping noises. It allowed to establish a connection to the AOLians. I've used it to investigate the mysteries of the 2nd Quake until my father told me to shut the artifact down because it interfered with our telephone.
This video is almost a relic itself.
http://www.friendster.com
Wait a minute, isn't that coldmirror at 1:38?
It's leader?
Al Gore🙄
"site" good one
Oh please, the Geocities and Yahoo Mailing Lists civilizations are far older and well preseved in the museum of Way Back
Though what is forever lost is the civilization of the IMDb message board with no remnants left behind
One day this will be true about youtube
This is will only age like a fine wine. Each passing year, the joke becomes better and better.
What about pornstars of the past? Any studies?
Wow, 10 years later and this could still be a new video.
Eventually, Facebook will be a conspiracy theory. Then it will be debated which online civilization came first.
Thanks youtube reccomended
20 Oh Four AD lol
Dear future internet archaelogists,
FUCK YOU.