Internet Archaeologists Find Ruins Of ‘Friendster’ Civilization

Internet Archaeologists Find Ruins Of ‘Friendster’ Civilization


Last month, internet archeologist,
Dr. Maxwell Frey, stumbled upon the perfectly preserved ruins
of an online community called Friendster. Dr. Frey good morning to you.
– Good morning. Dr. Frey, tell us about this
amazing discovery of yours. Well, it was called Friendster, and at its
peak it was a vibrant social network with more than 50 million members. – 50 million! – Wow!
– That’s right. But then, out of the blue,
the civilization just ended and the site was completely abandoned.
– Strange. One day Friendster users were posting a
seemingly endless stream of bulletins about awesome parties and cool shows
and then nothing. That is so eerie.
– Total silence. Today the ruins of the site remain
perfectly preserved as they were at the time of Friendsters demise,
sometime around mid to late 2004 AD. Wow, their lives just come to a complete
stop like a fly trapped in amber. Exactly. It’s really beautiful.
You can see how much work went into it. Now you just made this amazing discovery just by looking through an
old desktops browser history? That’s right.
And as soon as I entered the site, I knew I was the first human being to lay
eyes on those pages in many, many years. There must be so much to learn
from the remnants of this site. There is. Evidence suggests Friendster
users or Friends were a simple people, spending most of their time
gathering the names of bands to display on large ornamental
favorite music lists. Oh, I’m getting chills just looking at it. Brand names were important to them
just as they are to us today, but they revered something called
Six Feet Under as well as The Shins. They also prize photos
of themselves drinking. Everyone looks so happy.
– Such a mystery. So what happened to Friendster? Well, no single explanation
is universally excepted, but some of my colleagues believe that a computer virus may have wiped out
a large portion of the Friendster users, and then the rest fled their accounts
out of fear. Others believe that Friendster was only
meant to exist temporarily to fill a void left by another mysterious
civilization known as ALL, or perhaps AOL. Now, if the public is interested,
they can go visit the ruins of the website at www.friendster.com . All we ask is that they don’t
alter any content. They leave the site just as they found it. Of course. Well, thank you Dr. Frey
for being our guest. Thank you Dr. Frey.
– Thank you. It was my pleasure. Coming up, a new study
has linked heart disease to eating like a big, fat, disgusting pig
that no one could love. Still ahead this hour:
How to punch up your boring will.

100 thoughts on “Internet Archaeologists Find Ruins Of ‘Friendster’ Civilization

  1. We are currently on the throes of the last days of the maverick Facebook civilisation. Only the elders will soon be left since the young uns have all fled it's walls.!

  2. They say in the deep marshes their lurks a lost city of lost splendour used to communicate between millions the legendary MySpace where, I believe it is only a myth still records shown in the decaying ruins of vine show some hints

  3. But has anyone excavated the ruins of MySpace. I never got the chance to visit it but I heard it was a great mercantile civilization, comparable to Carthage.

  4. It’s funny to hear about “studies linking heart to disease to eating like big fat pigs that no one can love” from Pig Haeggerty

  5. "Aül"… I know this civilization.. I remember receiving numerous artifacts from this civilization – I believe they one thrived – distributing special coasters and chair stabilizers as cultural exchange.

  6. No mention is made of the fable, lost city of MaiSpate…or, as it was pronounced by its people in their now-dead language, "MySpace"? Folklore has it that they bored themselves to death, and thus, by consensus, just faded away.

  7. I have an AOL artifact from the last century, a silvery plastic disk in a metal cover. They were carried by trucks in masse and placed individually in little boxes in front of people's homes.

  8. I heard new fossils from pets.com were uncovered recently. Sadly the multitude of species were wiped out from reduced traffic due to "dot com boom" impacting earth.

  9. I remember the AOL civilization trying to make me one of their own by sending me hundreds of CD’s (compact disk, think small silver frisbee) in the mail. Just to clarify by ‘mail’ I mean a living human being would put them in a box attached to my house. I feel like a dinosaur and I’m not even 40 yet….

  10. I just went to check out this lost civilization of Friendster and it not where they said it would be (www.friendster.com). It appears that it fell into the ocean or the ground opened up during an Earthquake and it fell in.

  11. 2:22 – I kid you not, I had just put down the bowl, just finished the browner, after finishing a small pizza which I downed with coke

    I couldnt even be angry – I just laughed

    Also – am I being too "fan boy theory" when I link this comment [eating like a pig] to "Porkin around" and his ultimate demise

  12. This video is now itself more than twice as close to the age of Friendster than it is to us in 2019, a lost relic of the once thriving Onion Empire that ruled internet satire until the age of Trump killed political irony by creating a reality that was impossible for even the most outrageous parody to compete with.

  13. I just ventured looking for the lost civilization of Friendster, but it's now gone. It must of gotten swallowed up by an earthquake or swept out to sea in a giant tsunami.

  14. I have visited the common ancestor of Youtube called Albino Black Sheep dot com.
    It's so breathtaking.

  15. 1:22 I had never heard of this website but I did that, the very long list of bands… I feel called out.

  16. whoa, whoa, whoa.. . Did he just say "awul" in this 2009 interview?! really??? really?! Aol was in business from the 80's to 2009, Mr "internet archeology"

  17. "A new study links heart disease to eating like a big fat pig that no one could love!"
    Um… foreshadowing!?

  18. Friendster had only been abandoned for 4 years between then and the upload of this video. Now it's been 14 years, it seems less and less farfetched as the years go by.

  19. Sadly The Onion predicted it's own demise here… I mean it still once in a while makes content, but it's glory days are long gone.

  20. Soon, I will planning an excavation my self at the infamous "Obamacare.gov", I heard that everything is still untouched by humans on that site.

  21. Back in the day I've found an artifact which emitted ominous beeping noises. It allowed to establish a connection to the AOLians. I've used it to investigate the mysteries of the 2nd Quake until my father told me to shut the artifact down because it interfered with our telephone.

  22. Oh please, the Geocities and Yahoo Mailing Lists civilizations are far older and well preseved in the museum of Way Back

    Though what is forever lost is the civilization of the IMDb message board with no remnants left behind

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